In a World Where You Can Be Anything...Be Your Best Self featuring Michelle Marquis

Michele Marquis [: 00:00:00

When you have that highest level of energy, right? And you feel really like what some people call it, like they're in the zone, time just goes by. You don't realize it because you're so. Your energy, those high, high energy activities in there lies your passion.

Kate Volman [: 00:00:22

This is Lead with Culture. I'm Kate Volman, and I'm so excited about this episode because I am joined by our senior coach, Michele Marquis. Michele, this is going to be a fun episode.

Michele Marquis [: 00:00:35

Yes. This is a fun one. This is a fun one.

Kate Volman [: 00:00:38

This is a fun one because it's all about in a world where you can be anything. And the whole idea of this particular episode is it's kind of going to be like a mini episode. It'll be a nice short and quick boost of inspiration for you. And it is inspired by Matthew Kelly's book, In a World Where You Can Be Anything. And I love how he starts this off. In a world where you can be anything. So this book, it's designed to get you thinking about who you are, who you want to be, and who you are capable of being. I hope it opens new possibilities for you in every area of your life.

Kate Volman [: 00:01:18

This book is really fun. It's a great table book because we use it in our team meetings. We start each one of our team meetings by taking the book and flipping it through a page. So we start to flip, and then I ask someone on the team to say, stop. And Michele, let's do it. We'll do right now. Michele, ready? Oh, I'm like trying to show you, go, go, stop. Okay.

Kate Volman [: 00:01:42

In a world where you can be anything, be a great decision maker. So we've talked about decision making on this podcast, and so it just has these really beautiful ideas of, in a world we can be anything, be good with money, be understanding. And it's just so fun to kind of flip through this when you need a little bit of, I don't know, encouragement. Right, Michele?

Michele Marquis [: 00:02:08

Yeah, for sure. And again, a lot of those things in the book are about the qualities that we have, and I think that's really the biggest part of it. So the one we just chose is a good example. Right. Great decision maker. Be a great conversation with your team. Like, what does that mean? What does it take to be a great decision maker? And how do you demonstrate that on a regular basis, whether it be at home, in your personal life or professionally, what does it take to be a great decision maker?

Kate Volman [: 00:02:38

Yeah. And it also opens up that discussion to when have you made a good decision? Or what did you learn about a decision that you've made in the past that maybe didn't turn out so great, that made you a better decision maker when you had something similar happen to you.

Michele Marquis [: 00:02:57

Exactly, exactly. So it really spurs on deeper conversations with your team and for yourself. Some reflection for yourself.

Kate Volman [: 00:03:06

Yeah. And right now, so we're recording this at the. As we are in October of 2024, and it's a really good time to reflect on yourself. Right. Like these path, these, these next couple months, I feel like October, November, October, November, December. But obviously, anytime you're listening to this, if you're listening to this and it happens to be, I don't know, July of 2025, whatever it is, it's always a good time to reflect. But I think this time right now, it really is a good reflection time because we're kind of heading in, almost heading into a new year, and this is the time where people are thinking about what have I achieved this year? What are some of those dreams that I was able to achieve? What are some of the dreams that I didn't get to or that I kept procrastinating on? And then this idea of the possibility of who we can become, and we have to kind of have that anchor of who we want to become in order for us to achieve the dreams necessary in order to become that person, it doesn't just magically happen.

Michele Marquis [: 00:04:09

Absolutely. And in fact, I just had a coaching session yesterday with someone who is now kind of just picking her head up. Right. She's been in the same role for five or six years, and she's like, well, what's my next step and how do I prepare myself for that next step? So if she's a director in her company and she wants to get to the VP level, what does that look like? So it's really looking at, again, what are those qualities that I have, maybe the skills that I have that I need to work on going forward.

Kate Volman [: 00:04:39

We get to be really real with ourselves in some of the coaching sessions that you have. I'm curious because this is always interesting when talking to people about just being really honest with ourselves about who we are today versus where we want to be. So what is some of those conversations look like?

Michele Marquis [: 00:04:59

Well, interesting. So, I mean, the rhythm of life exercise that we do with some of the clients, I do it with most of my clients where we talk about the four different areas of life, physical, emotional, which is basically relationships, intellectual, which is being a lifelong learner, spiritual. Sometimes I'll add professional and financial, depending on the person. But it's interesting to hear people, you know, rate themselves on their level of satisfaction in those key areas because if they dont rate themselves at a high level, then where are you now and how are you going to get there? How can you increase your level of satisfaction? So physical is always a big one, right? So physical in that area, its rest. So sleep, diet and exercise, its all three of those things. So sometimes ill get people thatll rate themselves. Oh, I sleep like a rock. Really good.

Michele Marquis [: 00:05:53

Sleep is good, diet is good. But I don't really move. I don't go and intentionally go and have a physical plan from that perspective in my life. So that's where they start to focus in on, so that their overall satisfaction under that area becomes stronger for them. And we do that for every single area.

Kate Volman [: 00:06:14

And then we get to focus on those areas that aren't where we want them to be. I think it's so funny because many people will kind of focus on the areas they're already really, really good at, which is great, right? We focus on our superpowers and enhancing those, those skills. But also the other pieces, we just get to build that muscle a little bit, put ourselves into a more challenging situation. And physical is the one that comes up so often. It's so interesting to me because people can be so disciplined in some areas of their lives and not in others. I mean, that's everybody, right? That's human beings. I feel the same way about certain areas. I'm like, how can I be so disciplined? I happen to be very disciplined in my physical, like the exercise routine, all that that is, I don't have a challenge with.

Kate Volman [: 00:07:04

But then other areas I'm like, isn't it so funny how it's like not consistent with everything, but it goes down to your values and what's really important to you and always your dreams, right? Like, what is most, what are your priority dreams? What are the things that really matter to you? Michele, you have an exercise that you want to share with everyone.

Michele Marquis [: 00:07:24

Yes, absolutely. So here's the exercise. You select five to ten qualities you want to be known for. So think about, let me see, I wrote some down. Reliable, observant, coachable, funny, persistent, empathetic, authentic, loyal, thoughtful, generous, creative. There's a million in the book, not a million, but a lot in the book to choose from. So you sit by yourself, reflect, really look at your life and how those qualities that you really want to be known for. So this is part of your personal brand, right? And your personal brand contributes to your culture, at work, contributes to your life.

Michele Marquis [: 00:08:05

Every relationship so what are those five to ten qualities that you really want to be known for? That's the first step. Second step is find five people, at least five people, and ask them what qualities they see in you. So this is always a very interesting exercise. It's how I became a coach. I did this with a bunch of my, some friends and people that I had worked with and asked them to give me the qualities. And out of the five people, every one of them said, coach, you're a great coach. I'm like, what do you mean by that? I had never thought of becoming a coach at that time in my life, and it changed the trajectory of my career. Wow.

Michele Marquis [: 00:08:49

So it's a powerful exercise, and it's interesting how we think we're showing up in the world versus how other people are perceiving you in your qualities.

Kate Volman [: 00:09:01

And we talk about this sometimes when it comes to superpowers, everyone has their superpower, what they're really, really good at, what they excel at. And we don't often know what that is, or people don't give themselves a lot of credit because it's so. It comes so naturally to us that we don't recognize how much of a superpower it really is.

Michele Marquis [: 00:09:24

That's right. We take it for granted because it's part of the fabric of who we are. So we don't call it out and label it. Right. Because it's our natural ability, it's our natural quality. So it's, again, very interesting exercise to go through and really reflect back, and it gives you an opportunity to really think about what is the best version of me. What does that look like? What do I want it to be? So, yeah, be more intentional about the qualities that you want to be known for.

Kate Volman [: 00:09:55

Let's go through and find just a couple more. We're going to flip through this book, and you're going to tell me when to stop. All right?

Michele Marquis [: 00:10:02

Okay.

Kate Volman [: 00:10:03

All right, let's do it. Here we go.

Michele Marquis [: 00:10:05

Stop. Ooh.

Kate Volman [: 00:10:06

In a world where you can be anything. Be passionate.

Michele Marquis [: 00:10:11

Nice.

Kate Volman [: 00:10:13

Be passionate. You know, this is a great book to. Just to create your list of those ten qualities. You want to be known to five to ten qualities, because passion is something that it doesn't shine through in everyone. And when we find very passionate people, we connect with that because it's. There's so much energy that comes from their passion. And I think every one of us is passionate about something, but we. It's sometimes just, we don't focus on it.

Kate Volman [: 00:10:46

We're not focusing on what that passion.

Michele Marquis [: 00:10:47

Is or you don't have the opportunity to let it shine.

Kate Volman [: 00:10:51

Yeah.

Michele Marquis [: 00:10:52

You know, putting yourself in that position to do that. Yeah.

Kate Volman [: 00:10:56

It reminds me, like, when people talk about, oh, follow your passion. But the other advice that is actually better advice would be, we don't always have to follow your passion. You follow work that you're good at or work that you enjoy or, or you're following your curiosity. And when you start getting good at something, you get passionate about it. So I think a lot of people feel like, oh, I have to go find my passion. When really, what are you curious about? What are you excited about? Just explore a number of different things, and then when you start to, you'll start to recognize what you really enjoy and what you really like. And so we have to be doing the things. You have to be experiencing the things in order to find that passion.

Kate Volman [: 00:11:40

So we're not looking for the passion. You're going to discover it, but only by doing the work.

Michele Marquis [: 00:11:45

I love the way you just said that, Kate, because that's what I talk to my clients when we were doing the dream manager life coaching. Session six is all about time and energy. When you have that highest level of energy, right. And you feel really like what some people call it, like they're in the zone. They're in the zone. Time just goes by, you know, carefree timelessness is just flying by and you're, you don't realize it because you're so, your energy, those high, high energy activities in there lies your passion. You're going to find little glimpses of what you're doing, like, with one person. Again, we talked about a lot of different things.

Michele Marquis [: 00:12:25

And I said, what I hear is you're a builder. You love building things. I hear it in your hobbies, I hear it in your workplace, what you're doing with your people. You love to build things. I said, so where do you want to be five years from now? What do you want to be building five years from now? So that was really a fun conversation because I never thought of it like that. But that's what she's passionate about. And maybe it's not a thing. Right? It's not a thing, but it's what you do became for her.

Michele Marquis [: 00:12:55

She's thinking, yeah, that's what I love to do. I love to build. So that could be applied to so many different things, whether it's developing people at work, building an organization with a great culture, it could be building tables or art or whatever. So, yeah, when you're in a high energy activity, pay attention to what that is because that's usually where your passion is. Yeah.

Kate Volman [: 00:13:19

I love that. When you're in the zone, what are you doing when just time flies by and you're just. You could do it forever.

Michele Marquis [: 00:13:27

Yeah. And the energy stays at that level. It's. It doesn't drain you. You just stay right there. Yeah. Awesome.

Kate Volman [: 00:13:35

All right, we'll do one more. Ready? I'm gonna flip the book. I'm gonna flip the book upside down and go, stop. All right.

Michele Marquis [: 00:13:42

Ooh.

Kate Volman [: 00:13:43

In a world where you can be anything, be trustworthy. Be trustworthy.

Michele Marquis [: 00:13:49

Right.

Kate Volman [: 00:13:50

That one.

Michele Marquis [: 00:13:51

How do you do that?

Kate Volman [: 00:13:53

How do you, what does that look like? What does trustworthy look like? This is great for leaders, too, right? We talked a lot about, we talked a lot about building trust in an organization. That's the, that's the bare minimum, right? We have to have trust in an organization in order for people to feel like they can come to work. It's a safe space. They know that. They trust the leadership and they know that. I mean, when, when we have people in our lives, whether it's someone we work with or our friends, you know, are you the person that many of your friends are coming to because they know that they can tell you anything and it's going to stay with you? How often have you been in a conversation with someone and they're yapping away about someone else? And when that happens to me, all I think of is, well, what are they saying about me when they're talking to somebody else?

Michele Marquis [: 00:14:47

Yeah, absolutely.

Kate Volman [: 00:14:48

Absolutely.

Michele Marquis [: 00:14:49

No doubt. I think the other part about trustworthiness is doing what you said you were going to do.

Kate Volman [: 00:14:55

Yes.

Michele Marquis [: 00:14:56

That's super important in any circumstance, but especially in the workplace, because that's where you can really, your trust will deteriorate if you say, you know, as a leader, we're going to get this done. We're going to do this. And then you don't follow through either with a communication, an update, even. It is not going to get done now, but at least start to give them some communication around when they can expect it to happen. So I see that a lot.

Kate Volman [: 00:15:24

And right when you said that, Michele, you know what I thought is trusting yourself. When you say you're going to do something, do you actually do it?

Michele Marquis [: 00:15:33

That's it.

Kate Volman [: 00:15:34

Because that is a powerful thing when we have to trust ourselves. When, hey, if you're putting together this plan like, like Michele's talking about, right? If you're writing down who do you want to be a year from now? Well, you have to trust that you're actually going to do the things that is necessary in order to become that person. And if you don't trust yourself, what are the chances that you're actually going to show up and do this? So we have to build that trust in our teams and our relationships with our I significant others, with our children, with our families, our communities, our every. Every area of your life. You get to be more trustworthy. All right. Awesome. I love this.

Kate Volman [: 00:16:17

So I hope that everyone feels inspired and empowered to create their list of the qualities that they want to see in themselves a year from now. And maybe you have some of those qualities and you just want to get better at them. That is a beautiful thing as well. And everyone's gonna have so much fun with this activity of asking their friends, asking their family, their friends, maybe some of their co workers are close to what qualities they appreciate about. About each other. You know, if you. If you ask someone to do it for you, you can gift them the same back and get them thinking about some of the things that they want to improve on.

Michele Marquis [: 00:16:52

Absolutely. May change your whole trajectory of your life.

Kate Volman [: 00:16:56

You never know. Look at what look. You might change your career.

Michele Marquis [: 00:17:00

Who knows? Absolutely. Absolutely. It's crazy, but true.

Kate Volman [: 00:17:04

I love it. And if you want to have more conversations like this with one of our coaches, you know, this is what we're doing. We're talking to people about where they are, who they are today, who they want to be a year from now, two years from now. And these are the conversations we have in our. In our coaching sessions. And so if you're interested in having a conversation about what that might look like for you, we would love to have that conversation. You can go to Floydcoaching.com. check that out.

Kate Volman [: 00:17:30

Michele, always so fun chatting with you. Thank you so much for the exercise. Any parting words for. For our listeners?

Michele Marquis [: 00:17:39

Have fun doing this.

Kate Volman [: 00:17:41

I was just going to say, in a world where you can be anything, you can fill in the blank. In a world where you can be anything. Be fun.

Michele Marquis [: 00:17:48

Be fun. Have fun with this.

Kate Volman [: 00:17:51

Yeah, it's fine. Really, really.

Michele Marquis [: 00:17:53

Take the time to do this for yourself. We don't take enough time for ourselves.

Kate Volman [: 00:17:57

Do it. Michele, you're awesome. Thank you so much. Until next time, Lead with Culture.